I am cranky today. In fact I was cranky yesterday too. Let’s be real. We all get this way sometimes. My heightened sensitivity just before my moon leaves me edgy and tired. I am raw and open yet trying to continue with my life as if I am a super hero with an endless supply of energy. I mean who needs sleep right? At 4:30 this morning when my alarm went off I was pulled from a deep exhausted dreamless rest and contemplated staying in bed. Afterall, my first client isn’t scheduled until 1. Yet my to do list for work and home is very long and if I miss the 6am workout class I can pretty much guarantee I will not be working out hard, if at all. Why workout hard just before my moon, when I’m tired and feeling weighted with exhaustion? The answer is simple. I ALWAYS feel better when I workout. I may have to drag myself into the routine, but no matter what I feel better afterward. My brain feels better, I can organize my thoughts better and my body (even when feeling like a limp noodle) feels better than it would otherwise. So I got up. I ate my toast and drank my tea. And my inner critic was a little harsh with my tired self in order to get me into my gym clothes and out the door. But by 5:25 I was in the car and headed to the gym. And by 7 am I was on my way home to my massive to do list. And I’m doing it. I’m cranky about it but it’s slowly getting done.
I have talked to two girlfriends this morning. Both in similar stages of their cycles. And I found myself wondering where our red tent is. Where is the time for us to slow down, be quiet, gather, hold and be held by other women? How is it that we live in a world made up of at least half women, the majority of which have bled, will bleed, or are currently cycling and there is no space for this. Instead we take pills to stop our cycles completely, or (just like I did this morning) power through when all we really want/need to be doing, is resting. When maybe going for a long walk or taking a hot bath or spending some time just laying on the floor might actually fill our cups in a way that “powering through” does not. Don’t get me wrong, I am in fact a grown ass adult and am responsible for myself and my own actions, yet I find myself pondering why it is so difficult to slow the heck down and be gentle with myself instead of plowing through the to do list. It could wait right? Maybe?
My trek to the gym was necessary on several levels, but the way I went about it and all the tasks afterward may not have been the kindest or most loving way to take care of myself.
My point in writing this is to share a little of my own humanness with you all, and to maybe inspire you (and myself) to pause and ask yourself what it is that you actually need whether you are on your moon or not , and see if there is a creative way to make that manifest.
Our bodies are reflection of the earth. They are sacred and magical in all their workings and they allow us to connect with source through our connection to the moon cycles, the tides, the seasons and the pulse of the earth that can mirror our own.
So how do we honor this? What are the steps that we can take to follow the direction we are given when we listen to our bodies. What do you do Wise Woman to listen to your body? Do you have things you do to honor the rhythms and cycles of your being? And perhaps most importantly, how do we support and hold each other in this?
Emily Morrison MA, MFT